Delusional Sitcom Pointlessness
Things just never turn out like you expect them to, really. I mean, sometimes things end up close to what you imagine, but very rarely does everything go just the way you planned.
I planned on going to college, getting my degree straight out of high school, and going to work doing something I liked that paid me enough money that I could buy all the videogames I wanted.
Yeah. That didn't work out.
I have to admit, I never really thought I would ever get married. It just sort of snuck up on me, and really, it's been a pleasant surprise. I never thought I'd be where I am, living the relatively comfortable life that I do. This isn't to say I never have problems, or anything. Money and school constantly give me problems, but that's just how things are, and I'm used to it now.
Things have turned out well, and will hopefully keep getting better as time passes. I'm slowly balding, and I've come to grips with that. It's called a hat. Beautiful thing. I've come to realize I'll never be skinny, never be truly cool in the socially accepted sense, and never get that dream date with Christina Ricci. Those things just aren't attainable, or important.
If I'd known where I am now a few years ago, though, I would have been disappointed. Twenty year old me wouldn't have seen the good in where I am, or understood how I can be content as I am, or how in the world I would have ended up with my wife.
(Sure, he thought she was great, but mainly just a friend. It would have freaked my younger self out completely!)
I blame his disillusionment on a lot of factors. Societal ideas of the good life, and of family, for one. But mainly, I blame it on sitcoms.
I know, you're thinking, "Sitcoms? They're just television shows!" I disagree, or course. Sitcoms, (and other programming), were my other family growing up. I laughed at Urkel, had a crush on the girl from Full house, (I think her name was D.J.?), and wished my Wonder Years were as touching and interesting as those I saw on what my Dad has always jokingly called the "One-eyed god."
With their perfect thirty-minute, (or hour-long), endings and things that always worked out, they put in my mind this sense of how things should be, and how in the end, everyone always loved each other perfectly. Even when bad things happened, everything came out fine, even if it took a few "to be continued's."
It was all crap-ola, really. A bunch of junk. Meaningless drivel.
Life isn't that perfect, because we as a species, as the human race aren't perfect. We hate for no reason, do spiteful things, and feel the less desirable emotions like jealousy and greed.
It's a good thing, too. Life would be boring, otherwise. That's why sitcoms grow old after a few years on the air. Yeah, they may stay funny, like Frasier, but most of them die slowly, twisting and turning in the anguish of their perfect worlds. They have to make the stories more and more unbelievable, because they've made the family or group on the show so...lovey-dovey perfect that they have no more real conflict to play off of.
If you don't believe me, watch the last season of Family Matters.
So my life isn't a sitcom, like I imagined it would be. Those patterns and expectations that were slowly ingrained into my thoughts in thirty-minute chunks are out now. Erased. Gone.
I understand life more clearly now, because I've seen it, and been a part of it. Sure, there are bumps, have been bumps, and will be bumps in the journey, but isn't that half the fun?